Ted issued a statement explaining his daughters wanted to take a trip with friends, what with school canceled and all. He used an Ann Telnaes cartoon of it (she’s brilliant) in a fundraising letter. These are the same daughters he used in a political ad (reading a script attacking Hillary Clinton), then got all indignant and accused those who criticized it of inserting his daughters into politics. Don’t you just love that he wants to do his job AFTER everybody catches him? And, his excuse? He blamed his daughters. Naturally, after being caught, Ted is on the first flight out of Cancun…to the Bahamas. Ted Cruz is ignoring the worst thing to happen to Texas since it elected Ted Cruz. While everyone else’s have been freezing, Ted’ cojones have been warm and snugly (sorry I put the image of Ted Cruz’s hot and sweaty cojones in your brain). Ted? He’s trying to recover from getting caught vacationing during a natural disaster freezing his state. What’s that? Is it an American tourist? Yes! It is an American tourist! Why, it’s….oh f–k.”Īnd what has the guy Texas chose Cruz over been doing during this freeze? Beto O’Rourke has been part of a group that has called over 150,000 people, getting them to warming centers, and making sure they have food. Business is dying because of this pandemic. and definitely not out of the country on a tropical vacation.Īnd imagine if you’re in the tourism industry in Mexico. So while it’s going through a natural disaster, perhaps he should actually be in Texas. Ted was elected to represent every single person in the state of Texas. It looks delicious and I’m willing to try it as long as it doesn’t actually contain bits of real monkeys). Also, let’s not forget we’re in a pandemic and we’re trying to be responsible and discourage all travel except for the most important of reasons…not because Ted wants to sip a banana monkey on the beach (I just looked that drink up today, by the way. The freeze happened a couple of days before he left. It didn’t even happen while he was in line at the airport. You might think, “Well it’s not his fault this happened while he was on vacation, and you, cartoon boy, are not being fair.” But it didn’t happen while he was in Cancun. The biggest danger Ted has from the cold in Cancun is getting a brain freeze from his banana monkey. I would get a really tall ladder, climb over the wall, illegally immigrate to Mexico, then illegally vote in that nation’s election to help that guy win.Īnyway, while Texas is freezing and up to four million of his constituents have been without power with some people dying, Ted has been in Cancun where it’s nice and warm. He just hasn’t received the memo yet.Īnd, what’s with these goons hate-mongering on immigrants from Mexico taking vacations in Mexico? They’re not good enough to come to our country but he’s good enough to go to theirs? I expect some politician in Mexico to run for president on the campaign of building a wall to keep Ted Cruz out. Additionally, he’s a slimy shady disingenuous weasel who is as fake as they come.

Now, before you get upset and infuriated with Ted Cruz for going on a sunny vacation with his family in Cancun (in case you’re a Republican, that’s in Mexico), keep in mind, he’s a goon.

Ted cruz daughters monkey cartoon